Kochi is the only city in Kerala which is comparable to other metropolitan cities in India – the trend hub of the state. But in this article, I would like to be specific and reflect on the contemporary dating habits in order to explore the love culture of a 20 something Kochiite. They came into my life somewhere in the early 20s, when I felt tired of being mansplained by men who would try to psychoanalyse my dating choices and explain why I should date them instead of the others. ( It should be noted that the article is only based on 20-something, middle-class (and/or upper middle-class) English-educated adults, who use dating apps.)Īs a 27-year- old woman, dating apps are neither a novelty nor an old habit. This article is part of an effort to analyse dating experiences of Malayalis, including myself.
However, it does thrive as an active practice among the young population who keeps it private and to themselves. In Kerala, ‘ Love marriage’ in its truest sense is still an exception and not the rule.ĭating culture is not mainstream in the Malayali society i.e., it is neither publicly accepted nor family-approved. Kerala is known for its anti-right-wing politics, literate population, and secularism which is also reflected on its limited but relatively high statistic(19.65 percent) of inter-caste marriages. Indians in general and Malayalis in particular, are seen to have a clear compartmentalisation of what is considered public and private lives. This could be due to the disassociation of love from academics or the emotional labour it entails to be reflexive about one’s own life. The authors rarely reveal their own path of finding love in all forms and relationships. The research and writings on love and dating in India are predominantly data-driven and based on the analytics of dating apps.